Due to the.. Eh-herm. Physicality of what happens during intercourse, it should come as no surprise that having a bladder slip while having sex can and does happen. It's a thought that can cause severe anxiety and make sex a very low priority; but there are ways to keep it on the to-do list! Let's explore further.
As well as never having to experience periods, pregnancy, childbirth or menopause, did you know that unlike women, men have a natural mechanism that prevents them from urinating while they have an erection?
When the penis is erect the sphincter responsible for opening the bladder closes making it extremely difficult to pass urine through a man's urethra.
However there are exceptions to this rule; for example, many men who have had prostate cancer and/or prostate surgery can experience incontinence during sex due to weakened nerves around the urethral sphincter.
The majority of women who experience bladder leakage will also leak when having sex. With an already weakened lower pelvic area, sex can aggravate and put pressure on the bladder to make leakage occur at the worst. Possible. TIME!
Further, when a woman orgasms, the bladder can spasm and turn that moment of amazement into ama-whatTheHELL!
So if I leak.. Is my sex life over?
Here’s the good news. NO.
Even if you leak, you can still enjoy an extremely healthy sex life. As long as you or your partner don't have a bacterial infection or an STD, urine leaves the body in a relatively sterile state, meaning there are generally no physical health risks associated with bladder leakage during sex.
How can I manage and prevent bladder leaks while having sex?
1) Take this as an opportunity to try new things
Some positions will make you leak more than others, and this will vary from couple to couple, but positions that are less likely to make women leak include..- Woman on top
- 'From behind' (also colloquially known as 'doggy style')
- Side entry (less likely to put pressure on a woman's bladder)
Have a chat with your partner - and get experimenting! Plus, if you are brave enough to venture away from the bedroom, the shower could be a viable option..
2) Prepare for intercourse
Yeah, we know that this seems to take the fun out of the spontaneity, but if it stops leaks and actually helps you enjoy sex – is it such a bad thing?- Schedule a bathroom visit before doing the deed (or even two)
- Avoid coffee, alcohol and other diuretic drinks (which make you pee more) before having sex.
- Take a bathroom break during sex so your bladder is empty (timing will be key!)
- Stay hydrated during the day, but avoid liquids (water inclusive) an hour before having sex
3) Strengthen that pelvic floor
We are big advocates for pelvic floor exercises, and for good reason – they strengthen the muscles that support bladder control.
Click here for more information on how to get started. With commitment, you should notice improvements in bladder control across every area of life - intimacy included. Plus, strong pelvic floor muscles can lead to more intense orgasms. Incentive, anyone?
We recommend having a conversation with your partner if you're feeling worried or embarrassed about leakage during sex. Although it's not the most comfortable topic to bring up, chances are they will be far more understanding than you think. Plus it might break down a few communication barriers and make your connection even stronger than ever – which could improve your intimate relationship in more ways than one.
If you are really worried about the way that incontinence is affecting your sex life, we recommend seeing a specialist who will be able to recommend further treatment and devise a personalized plan moving forward.
With time, patience and experimentation, bladder leaks during sex can become a thing of the past – so why not get some action take action and start to investigate what works tonight?